Our Newest Little Angel

 Diana is so sweet I offered to take some pictures of James when he was just 10 days old.  I jumped on her offer since I hadn't even thought much about getting his pictures taken and it's something I love to do.

(me trying to keep him warm)

Sweet Baby James

He is almost one week old!  I have been loving hold him all day and relaxing.  I had an especially complicated delivery and really need to take it easy which means I get lots of couch time snuggling the cutest little James I've ever seen.  Last Monday I went in for my 36 week appointment and between my blood pressure that suddenly started to take off and the too much protein my body was dumping I was put on partial bed rest and tested to make sure the baby was safe.  It was official, I had pre-eclampsia for the forth time!  Dang it.  I had a feeling that the following week at my 37 week appointment that if my symptoms were worse then the doctor would want to induce the baby before I got really sick.  On Monday morning I went into my 9:00 appointment more anxious then ever.  I couldn't sleep the night before and kept dreaming of James when I did sleep.  I dropped Lincoln off at Diana's and told her I was so nervous!  I knew something was coming although it was so early.  Needless to say that at my appointment my symptoms had worsened and the Doctor did not want to wait any longer.  I was told to check into the hospital one hour later at 10:30 to be induced.  Ahhhhhhhhh.  It was happening and although I had the feeling it might I was not prepared.  I had packed a new outfit for James and a blanket or two and grabbed my makeup bag and that was all I had.  But I wasn't too worried about that.  I called Dave immediately who didn't believe me.  Okay, eventually he did and he left work right away to come down.  I went to Diana's and spased out a little bit partly in excitement and partly really nervous about the pain I'd be going through in a couple of hours.  I called around to Suzanne and Shauna and made plans for my boys for the that day and night.  I went to pick up Ammon at school and drop off Josh's lunch.  It was fun to tell Josh and Ammon.  Josh's eyes just got big and he said, "Already?".  Ammon jumped around in excitement.  I could tell that neither of them really knew what to expect.  And then of course I dropped by my mom's class to give the news.  She knew it might happen that day too and she just gave me a big hug and and wished me luck. 
So back to Diana's to drop Ammon off with her and I was off to the hospital!

Dave beat me to the hospital and we checked in.  My Dad also came then to be able to give me a blessing that I had asked for to help calm my nerves and pray that all goes well.  I checked in and my blood pressure was down at a much safer level!  We debated for about 30 minutes if we should call off the whole thing.  After much debate and knowing the doctor didn't want to back down we decided to continue to follow his advice.  So around 12:00 they started me on Magnesium (to keep my BP low) yuck!  I felt terrible within 5 minutes.  And antibiotics since I had Strep B.  I had to be on the antibiotic for 4 hours before I delivered so around 1:30 the doctor came to break my water thinking that it would still be awhile until delivery.  One hour later I was in heavy labor and wanting to push.  The nurses were surprised and weren't even planning on checking me for awhile.  I asked them to check me and I was at 9cm.  and wanting to push.  They were all shocked this was happening so fast and got the doctor over ASAP.  They had also discovered that James had is arm straight above his head ready to come out first.  Not good!  I was in so much pain and already pushing when this was being discussed and the doctor got in there and was calm about everything.  It hadn't been quite 4 hours since I was given the antibiotic but there was just no stopping things.  I was so worried about more pain with the hand problem but there was nothing I could do.  Just a little longer and he was out.  The doctor told me that he just held the baby's hand down while his head and then body slid out.  I asked what would have happened if the hand didn't stay down and he said it would have been an emergency C-section.  What a blessing!  I was in so much pain and to try and prep for a C-section while he was already in the birthing canal would have been even worse torture!  I'm so thankful to have had such a calm experienced doctor who handled in beautifully (Dr. Brent Lind, who also delivered Josh).    I got stitched up and laughed about how the nurses all kept commenting about how huge the placenta was? the biggest they had ever seen?...it turns out it was just full of a lot of blood.  In fact I was still bleeding a lot.  And didn't know then that I would keep bleeding a lot for the next couple of hours.
I could not get warm and kept asking for more and more warm blankets.  After holding James for about 20 minutes I let them take him into the nursery and I just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep.  They had to get me down to the recovery room and all I could do was slump over in my wheelchair with my head on my knees.  I think they knew I was in danger of passing out by then and they were trying to keep blood running to my head by keeping it down.  I got into my new room and curled up again with a ton of warm blankets and just wanted to sleep I was feeling so bad.

 

My family was showing up about now to see James so Dave wheeled him out to the lobby for everyone to see.  I was sad to miss everyone but didn't feel much for conversation at the moment.  My new nurses came in and tried to get me up and I passed out on them.  From then until about 4:00 in the morning it was a bit frantic in the room.  I was only out for about a minute which is good but I was getting worse and worse.  They put me on more meds.  more IV's and had to order two units of blood to transfuse me with.  I was so out of strength I couldn't push myself around in my bed or hardly talk.  I asked Dave for another blessing since I felt like me need for a blessing was completely different then why I had asked for a blessing earlier that day.  My wonderful Dad came to the hospital again and he and Dave again gave me a priesthood blessing and I felt 100x better about the blood transfusion I was about to receive and I also received a tremendous amount of peace about all those who were caring for me.  I knew they were being guided and prompted and making the best decisions.
I was so anxious to be feeling better.  I kept asking how long it would take after I received the transfusion to start feeling better.  It took a couple of hours but I could tell that there was life coming back into me.  By about 5:00am I finally was able to fall asleep since there weren't a lot of people in my room anymore and things were getting better.  I was starving for breakfast in the morning since the last thing I had really eaten was a small breakfast the morning before.  When it came I was so excited to eat but still didn't have enough muscle control to hardly lift my fork to my mouth.  A little while later they brought in my sweet little baby which lifted my spirits.  I felt like I had hardly been able to think of him since he was born.

That day was full of resting and holding my sweet new little baby.  They took me off Magnesium and I could feel myself improving by the hour.  I was discharged from the hospital on time and came home to my family that I was missing a lot.

My recovery since then has been good but slow.  The other morning I was getting myself ready for my first outing, just to Diana's house to take pictures of baby James, and by the time I was ready to walk out the door I could hardly support myself standing up.  My body and muscles were so tired and oxygen deprived from the that I just had to sit down and rest.  I can do just about anything I just have to do it slowly and take breaks.  I'm so glad to be home and feel like life is starting to return back to normal.  I had a wonderful three days with my mom who filled my freezer with dinners and treats while taking care of my kids.  Dave has been a great nurse and wares himself out taking care of all of my work and the kids and the house and his job.  The boys all love James!  They always want to hold him and they love having another brother.  Life is so good and I feel so blessed and I haven't to admit it has been nice to have an excuse to sit around and hold my little newborn all day long.